Introducing The Cinco Apart-Man!

*Bob Odenkirk voice*

Introducing the Cinco Apart-Man:

The human male who occupies your apartment at all times!

It’s Apart-Meant To Be!

Apart-Man stays stationary, so clean up is a snap!

His night-patrol mode activates in the early hours of the day, so he can roam your halls freely while you sleep!

Apart-Man is silent, so no worrying about him interrupting your joke at your promotion party!

[cuts to Apart-Man standing silently behind you as you tell a joke to guests, guests are appropriately terrified]

From the moment he enters your home, Apart-Man will never leave, and will always be together with you -

That’s right, he’ll be Apart-Of-You,

For the rest of your days!

The Cinco Apart-Man:

Try This Silent Houseman Today (?)


thank you podcast beyond crew for the name (ep 641), and to Tim and Eric for creating the evergreen magic that is Cinco ™. Try it today (?)